CHAPTER 1: THE FOUNDING

the yard is a small island near the british territory (we LOVE the uk!! the uk gives us money!!). the yard was founded a long time ago by six settlers who escaped the great battles on the mainland and sailed here with big dreams. all six founders are known!! they were:

ELENA F. YARD (the first yard!! the mayors grandmother!!)
WYOMING • DRAGON ENDRUS • RAIN • GUSTAVO WILLIAMS • ZOOBER

sad fact!!: all of the founders died at a young age, every one of them, except elena f. yard, who lived a long full life and handed the mayor job down her family, where it belongs, forever. the founders tombs stand in the graveyard. elenas tombstone reads: "THE ONLY SURVIVOR OF THE DISEASE." nobody knows what the disease is. the tombstone does not elaborate. the tombstone has been asked.

happy fact!!: zoober is also still alive!! zoober was a founder and zoober is still here, walking around, green as ever. the council has been asked how a founder is still alive. the council has asked zoober. zoober smiled. the math does not work. the council does not do math anymore. UNKNOWN

in the town square there is an old mural of the islands two guardian brothers, painted by the founders themselves. one brother gives. one brother was sealed beneath. the mural was repainted at some point and nobody remembers what the sealed one looked like, which is fine, because murals get repainted all the time.

the mayor job is HEREDITARY and has passed from elena down through the family ever since. the current mayor received it from his grandmother elena as a young man. this is a normal job system and nobody was ever upset about it. (yooper yard was upset about it. do not bring it up.)

(town scrapbook: the mayors first day. the whole town came. the corner of the photo says "Sorry Yoop!" in the mayors handwriting. yooper wanted to be mayor. bob did not want to be mayor. bob was forced to be mayor, because the job goes where elena put it, forever. the apology was accepted. the apology was not meant. the job was not arguable.)

CHAPTER 2: THE FESTIVAL OF THE YARD

every year the founders held a festival called the FESTIVAL OF THE YARD (the name was chosen by elena, who believed a town can never have too many things called yard). it was held around the towns ceremonial artifact, whose name the council has redacted for safety reasons. the artifact was not dangerous. the artifacts name was.

what the artifact did during the festival is not written down. where the artifact is now is also not written down. UNKNOWN

the festival of the yard was discontinued after the incident, which we will not be covering in this chapter. or any chapter. the council thanks you.

CHAPTER 3: THE GREAT UNIVERSITY EXODUS

at some point many young yards decided to leave for fancy universities on the mainland (rude!!). the yard would like to remind everyone that THE YARD HAS SCHOOLS!! we do have education here!! it is just a lil lesser, but it IS education!! please come to the yard!!

the empty houses are cheap. come live in one. bring the kids. the school has a bell and everything.

CHAPTER 4: THE FIRE

there was a fire. bella yard, beloved wife of mayor bob yard, did not survive it. the mayor was away when it happened. the official finding: a lamp was involved, and it was noobers fault. noober yard was near the house when the lamp fell. that is the whole finding. the finding is complete.

the mayor came back to nothing. the mayor does not discuss the fire. the mayor discusses the flowers he grows for bella instead. he named each flower. there are many flowers.

CHAPTER 5: THE ACCIDENT

shortly after the fire, noober yard, beloved brother of yoober and goober, passed away in an accident. the town does not use the word the mayors grief used. the mayors grief was enormous and public: he stopped playing, stopped visiting, and wrote songs. the songs are about rent. UNCONFIRMED

noober is buried in the town graveyard. his headstone is the one with words on it. we checked.

CHAPTER 6: THE MAYORS SABBATICAL

recently, mayor bob yard took a short sabbatical of three (3) days to focus on himself. during the sabbatical he was unreachable, which was restful for him. when he returned he was refreshed and knew even more what was best. he also knew a new song.

the council reminds residents that people come back from sabbaticals all the time and are completely normal afterwards.

(the sabbatical location was not disclosed) (pop knows) (pop is not talking)